I do not want to write this

A forced moment of self-degradation
I do not want to write this at all. But I do not have a choice in the matter. What I don’t want to write about is how I drive myself to the brink and over when I get bored. I do not have a choice because I have absolutely nothing else I can do to stave the boredom. I killed every Scrubs episode till the sucky season (I’ll let you decided which one that is). I have watched every Tremors movie in the series and which I think was genius until thirty two minutes into the second installment. There are 4 movies in that series. I make multiple trips to Wal Mart to get only one or two items that I may need the next morning for breakfast. Then I go back to what? You guessed it more Netflix. Blah blah blah blah how I suffer and how I am my own worst enemy.
I told you I do not want to write this. I don’t. I am sitting here thinking how I can make the little tidbits about how I spend my time funny to a reader. How can I depreciate myself in a pathetic situation like David Sedaris? My heart is not in it, this is a forced catharsis. So it is not really cathartic at all just an explanation. Explaining to whom? No reads my blog anyways. So lets force this catharsis even further.
So I am bored and I hate it. I hate it because I think too much. My mind goes 1,000 mph towards self-doubt-Ville. Bo-hoo me right? Yeah I think of what I’ve done wrong to other people. What other people have done wrong to me and why I might have deserved it or not. What am I doing here, should I be somewhere else? Am I doing the right things in my major, am I in the right major? This isn’t motivated by self destruction, the opposite actually. I want to always to fix things. Find problem and fix it. That’s what I do. Combine that with a good memory and enough free time to solve world hunger and bam we got a problem. We got my last two weeks. This is a problem that I must fix. But how do I fix the problem of me looking for problems to fix. That is a nasty nasty nasty catch-22 right there. I laughed at how pointless it seemed till it went all clairvoyant on me. I don’t fix it. I leave it the akslfkjnadwkjfa alone. To fix the problem of constantly looking for problems I stop trying to fix the problem. I fix the problem by not fixing the problem. Holy mother of cows and other tasty animals!!! This catharsis worked. I seriously wasn’t planning on that. I was just making myself take a break from Netflix, catharsis achieved.