WAKE-UP

Different ways to wake up and some ways i'd like to wake up:
-well rested
-alone
-way too early
-way too late
-late for a test/work
-from a power nap with work to do
-from a way too long nap and now you can't move
-in middle of the night, worrying
-right when the sun is coming up and the birds chirping
-when the neighbors/roommates are leaving the driveway/house
-on someone else's couch and they are giving you a dead arm
-when the dvd menu just keeps repeating itself
-after everyone else has left the room and you don't know where they went
-on the trampoline
-as your head falls off your hand in class
-on the pebbles in the garden
-driving on the wrong side of the road
-holding your baby niece
-blindly searching for your alarm clock
-with someone tapping on your car window
-being the big spoon, her hair all in your face
-on your knees
-with the same song on repeat
-hand against face now that side of your face is all sweaty
-book/laptop on your chest
-walking to the fridge to drink something cold to calm down
-after hearing a weird sound outside
-phone on your collarbone so you don't miss the alarm or call your expecting
-in the same clothes you wore last night
-christmas morning
-hungry
-not horny
-horny
-with the 6 hour old text reply he sent you after you fell asleep
-shivering with the no blanket
-someone using you and the bed as a landing pad, unexpectantly
-with an emergency phone call
-hours before she is bound to even think about getting up
-mom cooking breakfast jamming "More than a Feeling"
-sore with bruises
-3am and you're sick
-pulling into the driveway after a long trip
-as fast as you can to beat roommates to the shower
-on the opposite end of the bed
-freaking out because you do not know how you got here
-bad dreams
-hearing her curse the kids outside with that sexy whiny morning voice
-after a really big blow to your cranium
-with dad dying and mom is screaming downstairs
-waking up after every single time you go to sleep

128 square feet to Freedom

I have not lived a long time on this planet. So the feelings to have lost something that you once possessed are relatively new for me. I am not talking about losing my teeth, or even my fear of camping in dark forests.

As you grow up you learn lessons. You gain attributes and skills. You get stronger and more independent. You find your own direction and method to get things done. You are adding and adding and maturing.

So this new feeling of noticing that something you depended on has slipped away, is not one i like at all.

To be Free.
The idea of freedom for me, is something so different than the word really relates. When i am free it is because i made the right decision and i will not suffer any pain from a wrong decision. Without that pain to slow me down i am free to do what ever i want for who ever i want. (a humble man would replace the "want's" with "can")

I do not have the same fire and passion for that freedom anymore. I've let so many little things wash it away recently.

It is time to fix that.

Among other more personal parts of my plan, i have a empty wall next to my bed. 16x8 feet. In the bottom right corner, near where my head rests while i sleep there are seven cards. On each of these cards i have written something that my former freedom brought me, the things i miss the most. I plan on tacking up at least one card a day. I would like to cover the 128square feet with reasons to make my freedom, mine.

Now i must decide wither to go scotch tape or thumbtacks.

'91 is 19 backwards

I won't lie i was looking at pictures of a former high school flame. One of the few girls in my memory that actually got more attractive as opposed to more drunk, pregnant, addicted, boring or dead in the six years since we all parted. I am not getting all "just friends ryan reynolds" here wishing it would have played out differently; no need i survived high school and the six years afterwards i shouldn't ask for more. But i looked at some of her pics and was slightly enamored to the point of thinking, "hmmmm how could i swing seeing her again come christmas break?"

The First thoughts that came to me where quite the shockers...

Its been a while since you have ever gone/made/went -out with a girl your age. BOOM

How did i get to the point that i'd have to look into the dating historical annals to figure out the who was the last girl i dated that was within two years of my age? BOOM

Mitch to the best of your knowledge it was WELL OVER 2 YEARS AGO. BAM

Do you even remember what it was like to date someone who wouldn't get carded at a bar? BOOM

so i began to think...

Mitch did it really make that much of a difference when you did date someone who was born before grunge died? In those cases no Mitch they didn't.

Would it make much of a difference in any case? It has the potential to make all the difference, common interests, and some of them must of grown up a bit just like i have, right.

When i reached the conclusion that maybe more mature women may be necessary to my romantic interludes. I immediately posed myself the magic bullet question. Which magically blew my heart out the wrong side of my spine.

So Mitch, where are all the women closer to your age that you could be attracted too?

Oh yeah, all the older mature boys snatched them up when they were 19.

Vexat-, Tribulat-, Redempt-, -ion

I really like the films like, Cinderella Man, Invincible and The Sting. Cinderella Man and Invincible are at their most basic level inspirational sports movies and well Robert Redford ran a lot from mobsters and crooked cops in The Sting. But the sports have really nothing to do it, maybe a little but not too much.

What are the experts calling it now, "growth recession" or even the "BBQ Recovery"?

Low and slow just like the coal grill on the back patio. Stats might (with the right tweaking) be growing but not faster than that nasty inflation. You know that thing that makes the same product more expensive as it just sits there.

We patted ourselves on the back this September, we stayed at 9.1% unemployment. You know i lowered my expectations once to make things look better. She wasn't disgusting but the only thing she had going for her was that she qualified with my hetero-sexual ways, she was a girl.

GOP hopeful's remind me when the first kid got a trampoline on the street. How many kids could we fit on the biggest toy on the block, trying to steal the bounce from each other? Reversely Obams (cute huh?) feels like that QB who couldn't get that 3rd and long conversion all night, his punter must be getting tired.

I rant (Wall Street should choke and die) and I rant (banks are dens of thieves) and I will now get mooshy.

I like those movies because, they are people surrounded by their families whom are surrounded by really dismal economic situations. The world sucked at the start of the film and it sucked at the end. But the characters and their families experienced redemption. Albeit (finally got to use that word) after much cinematic tribulation.

I would wish that the director is getting close to that scene, for us (vague on purpose).