Die young and save yourself!!!

You know what I hate and I hate and I hate even more? A meet up that leaves a bad taste in your mouth. It did not go the way you planned it, the way you envisioned it, the way you wanted it. Not so much like in 500 days of summer where he was totally let down, but where you are totally left thinking and freaking. Like, “wait what did that all really mean, did he/she want me there? Why did he/she act like that?” You leave the person’s house thinking you messed up, you just knocked a chip off the statue of David and now you are in some bad area. You are in the danger zone, and what will make you hate it even more is that it will not be less than 24 hours before you are allowed to know if you are freaking over nothing or not. That bad taste, that fear that you actually did mess up Michelangelo’s masterpiece will stay there. Every time you think of that person, the thoughts of fun and attraction that originally drove you to meet up with person will not be the first ones to pop, the immediate angst will surface. You want to fix it, take charge, but you can’t because you have to wait it out. Be Patient. Isn’t that the worst part of having a bad taste in your mouth, there is never anything close by to wash it away?

GIVE IT UP GIVE IT UP, DOWN

Things I can say to you but I don’t. This is not because I am not a talker. Far from it baby. People wonder how I am so skinny; I personally got a call from an ol’ acquaintance by the name of jen Aniston. She’s kinda built her popularity empire on a few indisputable facts. Her hair, how she got screwed by the hated A. Jolie and her wiles, and how incredibly she has the same body as she did back when we didn’t know that friends would go nine seasons. Anyways getting off topic she called me cause she wanted to know how to keep that body so people can keep looking at her exclaiming she got screwed by bradgelina ultimately ending with she still has great hair though. I told her get talking. That’s it that’s all there is nothing needed more than a tongue that whips itself into a vernacular frenzy. Granted she and anyone down with taking my advice may not be found the most enjoyable person to be around cause I don’t like a motor mouth girl but hey if it keeps you fit (British usage of the word) than guaranteed no one will care cause you got the necessary curves and everyone is shallow enough to go for that. That advice is complete crap and I don’t even believe in it but it proves my point that I like to talk. But I don’t talk about everything. I specifically choose not to talk about anything that will even remotely seem like I am bragging. Oh my goooooooodness I am scared of death of someone thinking that I am bragging. I’d rather be held down and made to watch someone lower a pissed off hornet held lightly with tweezers to my body to have it sting and sting me than get caught bragging. I choose not to talk about things I have done, where I have been, what I am doing and what I like. Unless it’s a completely heinous statement or I make a disclaimer joke at myself for almost crossing over that bragging/conversational line. I have things to brag about, I am a pretty interesting guy I can admit deep inside, but people don’t need me to tell them why. If my qualities aren’t obvious or findable I don’t have them I guess and so I don’t need to tell people what they are. Go ahead try to make me brag, you wont.