GIVE IT UP GIVE IT UP, DOWN

Things I can say to you but I don’t. This is not because I am not a talker. Far from it baby. People wonder how I am so skinny; I personally got a call from an ol’ acquaintance by the name of jen Aniston. She’s kinda built her popularity empire on a few indisputable facts. Her hair, how she got screwed by the hated A. Jolie and her wiles, and how incredibly she has the same body as she did back when we didn’t know that friends would go nine seasons. Anyways getting off topic she called me cause she wanted to know how to keep that body so people can keep looking at her exclaiming she got screwed by bradgelina ultimately ending with she still has great hair though. I told her get talking. That’s it that’s all there is nothing needed more than a tongue that whips itself into a vernacular frenzy. Granted she and anyone down with taking my advice may not be found the most enjoyable person to be around cause I don’t like a motor mouth girl but hey if it keeps you fit (British usage of the word) than guaranteed no one will care cause you got the necessary curves and everyone is shallow enough to go for that. That advice is complete crap and I don’t even believe in it but it proves my point that I like to talk. But I don’t talk about everything. I specifically choose not to talk about anything that will even remotely seem like I am bragging. Oh my goooooooodness I am scared of death of someone thinking that I am bragging. I’d rather be held down and made to watch someone lower a pissed off hornet held lightly with tweezers to my body to have it sting and sting me than get caught bragging. I choose not to talk about things I have done, where I have been, what I am doing and what I like. Unless it’s a completely heinous statement or I make a disclaimer joke at myself for almost crossing over that bragging/conversational line. I have things to brag about, I am a pretty interesting guy I can admit deep inside, but people don’t need me to tell them why. If my qualities aren’t obvious or findable I don’t have them I guess and so I don’t need to tell people what they are. Go ahead try to make me brag, you wont.